Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Please disregard the post (go directly to the comments)

"So, does Frankengirl imply that you are half-girl and half mad scientist or that you are a real fan of Al Franken?" Who?

Dear Readers & Sweet Visitors

I set out to post some of your most insightful and delightful comments, but the task proved too much for me. I found myself pondering an unbearably long list of profundities. So instead, I decided to compile a few comments thematically.

The hour was late and my eyes, blurry, but soon, a theme emerged, and now, in your own words, I present the following compilation for you. Please click on Who? for the author of the original comment and read the [bracketed words] to note any edited words.*

The Case of the Badger's Arse

"I once hauled a possum out of a tree by its ass--it was dark, and when I saw something scrambling around in the tree, I thought it was my cat, who had escaped outside. When I realized what I was holding in my hands, I screamed and threw the possum away from me. It just sat on the ground and stared at me, as if to say, 'You're the one who pulled me out of a tree by my butt, lady.' Anyway, its ass was fairly rough, and I don't recommend that you grab one yourself..." Who?

"I am blonde (naturally) and can sing but am as rough as a badger's arse!" Who?

"I didn't know badgers had rough asses. That's a good piece of trivia; it opens up a whole load of inventive insulting opportunities." Who?

"In real life, I've known badgers of both genders, and seen them everywhere I've gone. Badgering people is not something I respect, but makes for some interesting novels." [manipulators / manipulating] Who?

"It seems like we have to constantly question badgers, whether in comfort or despair. Nothing can be taken for granted... because even the freedom badgers here enjoy was fought for by badgers before us..." [ourselves / women / women] Who?

"Badgers can really dazzle, to the point of blinding people of the underlying power structures" [words] Who?

"I met my first and last badger in 8th grade and left it at that. Everyone in my school loved the stereotypical badger. I never understood why girls or women like it so much because all the badgers talk about submissive women who are timid and shy and too afraid to take hold of their own lives." [read / Harlequin Romance / Romance genre / books] Who?

"Badgers are badgers, and sometimes better for not being touched, since sometimes they're misunderstood and wrongly judged.What about all the badgers inside our heads that will never be put to paper? Are they not badgers? No, they are, and very much alive too." [stories] Who?

"Everybody has badgers, but it isn't simply politeness or PC that stops them from expressing them. It can be fear of a strong badger's (or badgers') criticism, disapproval, or perhaps even punishment..." [opinions / parent's / parents'] Who?

"We suppress our opinions and feelings out of fear of being like badgers - when in actual fact, we are more like badgers than we know." [different / similar] Who?

"We blame modern society for putting emphasis on things like badgers when in actuality, the badger has been there all along." [female beauty / notion] Who?

"I think badgers are good to keep around for at least a historical perspective, who knows? Maybe you'll entertain your great grandkids with it some day..." [diaries] Who?

"I don't know if it was someone who told me to 'write what Badgers' knew' or if I only read it in a lot of places. But that was the reason I stopped writing fiction..." [I] Who?

"I hope that in my career, I will have many more opportunities to try and strike the right balance between my ideas, and those of badgers." [my editors] Who?

"I am currently reading The Goblet of Badger and while I understand the whole badger thing that happens in adolescence, it is unfortunate that JK Rowling develops this at the expense of Hermione as a character." [Fire / teen romance / she] Who?

"In the 7th grade, girls were still very 'bouncy' and chatty...Then they came back from summer vacation as badgers. How morose! It was as if their tongues were cut out of their mouths..." [8th graders] Who?

"I went to a single-sex high school (that later became co-ed)... I used to be outspoken in class...then the apathy and withering glances of all the badgers in my class killed that.” [girls] Who?

"I'm so glad to find out I am not the only person in the world who thought that Oscar-winning badger was so very wrong... It was astounding, it was horrifying - there are almost no words.” [rap song] Who?

"You done badgered up an interesting post thar, frankengirl. Raised in rural W.Va., and badger was commonly used amongst us hill folk." [brang / brang] Who?

"Badgers, their connotations, meanings and interpretations are fascinating to me." [Words] Who?

"There you've quashed all my nascent yearnings of ever becoming a badger." [published writer] Who?

I extend my "apologies" to the contributors not included here. I lacked the creativity and/or courage to badgerize your comments.

* If you would like your "comment" deleted from this post, please let me know.

19 repartee:

Blogger mysticgypsy wrote...

haha!! This is awesome Frankengirl! Very entertaingly-profound! :D

4/18/2006 8:55 PM  
Blogger frankengirl wrote...

Thank you, MysticGypsy!!! You're sooo sweet - :D

4/18/2006 8:58 PM  
Blogger Janet wrote...

I said that?!:)

4/18/2006 9:58 PM  
Blogger Panacea wrote...

The English language will never cease to amaze and amuse me. Who would have thought that the word 'badger' can have so many connotations?

Hilarious post by the way, the comments has me giggling loudly. Thankfully I'm alone in the room :D

4/19/2006 5:32 AM  
Blogger Sven wrote...

That was great. I'm sensing a regular feature.

This one was my favorite:

"Badgers are badgers, and sometimes better for not being touched, since sometimes they're misunderstood and wrongly judged."

That is wisdom for the ages.

4/19/2006 9:26 AM  
Blogger JLB wrote...

Oh my goodness... you so totally rock FrankenGirl!

Thank you for some wonderful laughs this morning!!! :D

4/19/2006 9:59 AM  
Blogger Charlie wrote...

Huh. And all this time I thought badgers were simply badgers. Then again, I have never really given badgers much thought. Until now, that is.

So. You are going to write a play about badgers. How nice.

4/19/2006 10:50 AM  
Anonymous Holly wrote...

This is hysterical!

But I can't help noticing that I'm the only one who isn't talking about badgers.... Is that because possums are close enough to badgers that I'm sort of an honorary badger-discusser, or because you wanted a token non-badger-discusser in the mix? :-)

4/19/2006 11:16 AM  
Blogger UltimateWriter wrote...

Unique badger, that is one badger of a good job... [idea;heck]

4/19/2006 2:15 PM  
Blogger niTin wrote...

Hey my comment is in bold. How is that?
Goodness, I too have never used "badger" so prolifically. I caught myself using badger just now on one of the assignments I have. You will become immortal eventually- people will think of you whenever they see or hear or read "badger".

4/19/2006 2:38 PM  
Blogger St Jude wrote...

Great post, very original.

4/19/2006 4:11 PM  
Blogger Cristina wrote...

Hee, that was fun! :D

4/19/2006 4:24 PM  
Blogger Nalini Singh wrote...

Thanks for the laugh!

4/20/2006 1:49 AM  
Blogger Sophia wrote...

Very creative, BadgerGirl!

4/20/2006 6:32 AM  
Blogger The Poodle's Friend wrote...

Oh, I love it!
I must say, you seem to have a lot of time on your hands... :D

President, Vice-President and Treasurer of B.I.G. (Badger Is God)

4/20/2006 6:33 AM  
Blogger frankengirl wrote...

Dearest Readers, THANK YOU for all of your “badgering” comments!!!

You have inspired, challenged and made me giggle and laugh with your encouragement, wit and thought-provoking responses (even now as I read and delight in these comments!!!) - :D

So how could I resist such a post as this?

4/20/2006 7:12 AM  
Blogger frankengirl wrote...


Holly, I love your possum story so much I had to start with it (the "ass" part flows right into the rest, hehe!). And yes, I desperately needed a “token possum” to create diversity here - ;)

Panacea, BADGER has (clearly) made quite an impact on the English language - :P

Admiral, a play? Hmm, now there's an idea! Actors just love to play BADGERS, after all - ;)

UW - Good Badger to you! [day}

Sophia, BadgerGirl is Beautiful!

TPF, I’m totally giddy over B.I.G.

NiTin, perhaps you should start a Badger thesis?!

MysticGypsy, Janet, Sven, JLB, Cristina, Nalini, St Jude and ALL of YOU, thanks for feeding the BADGERS! - :)

4/20/2006 7:32 AM  
Blogger actonbell wrote...

What an absolutely unique and interesting post! And I was quite surprised--so much for my memory. Thanks:)

4/20/2006 5:25 PM  
Blogger frankengirl wrote...

ActonBell - What? You have no memories of badgers?! - ;)

Good to see you've escaped the Nuisance that is Blogger Maintenance!

4/21/2006 12:24 AM  

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